


D.I.S.G.R.A.C.E CHAT 2.0

by renacesance



Category: A.C.E (kpop), 에이스 | A.C.E
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 03:15:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11546331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renacesance/pseuds/renacesance
Summary: in which junhee abuses his power and the boys are desperate to eat decent food.





	D.I.S.G.R.A.C.E CHAT 2.0

**Author's Note:**

> this one has even more explosive profanities and harsher humor than the first. you have been warned.

**_CHAT ID's_ **

__

peasant/lordalmightypowerful - junhee  
bracesboy - donghoon  
swoleyoon - seyoon  
jacekim - byeongkwan  
jchan - yoochan

**_— The Chronicles of Four Hungry Boys_ **

**_peasant joined the chat_ **

**peasant:** alrite speak up  
**peasant:** which clown changed my fucking id  
**peasant:** its kwan isnt it u little shit  
**jacekim:** tf u yapping abt i didnt touch a single atom of your phone  
**jacekim:** u always find reasons to blame me for shit i didnt do  
**jacekim:** stop holding such strong grudge against me for reading your cheesy diary  
**bracesboy:** i dont see what the problem is  
**bracesboy:** ur id got an upgrade.  
**bracesboy:** now its more modest and humble  
**swoleyoon:** did u rlly just consume ur last drop of dignity to change ur id to middle school level name-calling  
**bracesboy:** hey at least it isnt pretentious bodybuilder nickname  
**bracesboy:** the only thing swole abt u is ur ego  
**jchan:** oOoOoh sick burn

**_peasant_ changed his id to _lordalmightypowerful_**

**lordalmightypowerful:** ok the next jackass to change my id again is losing a leg  
**swoleyoon:** this guy knows no modesty  
**bracesboy:** he gets progressively narcissistic each passing day  
**bracesboy:** can u believe such ability exists  
**jacekim:** so his rapping isnt the one causing global warming  
**jacekim:** its his huge ass inflated ego thats destroying our ozone layer  
**jacekim:** god help us all  
**swoleyoon:** im calling it now  
**swoleyoon:** the world will end when he gets compliments  
**jchan:** but u know  
**jchan:** jun hyung can be a good leader at times :)  
**bracesboy:** CHAN TAKE THAT BACK  
**jacekim:** NO CHAN WYD  
**swoleyoon:** [breaking news] the world is coming to an end!  
**lordalmightypowerful:** about time someone from this dysfunctional household decides to give me the appreciation and respect i deserved  
**jacekim:** what kind of nonsense  
**lordalmightypowerful:** i, the king, deserve to be flooded with compliments  
**bracesboy:** im fucking signing the fuck out  
**jacekim:** can someone kindly overthrow lord fuckward over here from his throne  
**jacekim:** that would be greatly appreciated  
**lordalmightypowerful:** yoochan is getting treated to a nice dinner later  
**jchan:** :D  
**lordalmightypowerful:** u peasants can enjoy ur crummy ass ramyeon  
**jacekim:** wait wtf we had the budget to a potential nice dinner???  
**jacekim:** and u kept it all this time??? u selfish motherfucker  
**lordalmightypowerful:** of course, i decide when to give u idiots rewards  
**bracesboy:** this is abuse of power  
**swoleyoon:** junhee is kim jongun: a conspiracy theory  
**jchan:** guys its simple math really :)  
**jchan:** u tell him what he needs to hear = he gives u what u want  
**bracesboy:** so basically suck up to his crusty ass  
**lordalmightypowerful:** thats right yoochan, my smart little servant  
**jacekim:** u do know hes implying that we force compliments right  
**lordalmightypowerful:** a compliment is a compliment no matter the intention  
**jacekim:** u lost me after u started saying some stupid shit  
**swoleyoon:** hes officially gone insane  
**bracesboy:** this is what being a leader does to ur mentality  
**jacekim:** hold the fuck up lemme give this a shot  
**jacekim:** junhee ur stupidly clever at times :)  
**lordalmightypowerful:** ur eating out of an empty plate later u asshole  
**jacekim:** wtf isnt that how this compliment thing works  
**bracesboy:** i dont understand the mechanics of this game  
**jacekim:** a compliment is a compliment no matter the intention my ass  
**bracesboy:** wait let me try  
**bracesboy:** let me channel my inner poet  
**bracesboy:** that always gets the ladies  
**lordalmightypowerful:** umm im a manly man???  
**jacekim:** yea say that to ur hello kitty journal  
**lordalmightypowerful:** hello kitty is the mascot of masculinity wys  
**bracesboy:** everyone shut  
**bracesboy:** here it goes...  
**bracesboy:** shall i compare thee to a catastrophic day?  
**lordalmightypowerful:** how about you william disappeare from my sight  
**bracesboy:** u didnt even let me finish. i worked days on end for that poem. its my masterpiece  
**swoleyoon:** thats plagiarism  
**bracesboy:** tHaTs PLaGiArIsM  
**jchan:** backhanded compliments dont work on him guys get it right  
**jacekim:** so what, he wants us to tell him insincere stuff like he looks a little over average?  
**lordalmightypowerful:** tf does that even mean  
**swoleyoon:** ur good looking from a 180 degree angle  
**jchan:** no, revise that sentence :(  
**jchan:** guys cmon im helping yall  
**jchan:** i dont want to eat on the same table as him alone :(  
**bracesboy:** dont worry bby boy i wont leave u alone w that creepy old man  
**lordalmightypowerful:** speak for yourself donghoon ur older than me  
**lordalmightypowerful:** be good little pets and listen to yoochan  
**jacekim:** he just fucking said he didnt want to eat with u, u nutjob  
**bracesboy:** how does one even compliment a park junhee without insulting him  
**swoleyoon:** hey junhee u have a nice penis  
**bracesboy:** a nice w HA T  
**lordalmightypowerful:** damn son...  
**lordalmightypowerful:** i do???  
**jchan:** w h a t...  
**jacekim:** a nice penis?!??!?  
**jacekim:** kim seyoon have u been cheating on me this whole time?!?!??  
**jacekim:** with park junhee of all people?!?!?!  
**swoleyoon:** wait what  
**swoleyoon:** *wenis!!!! fucking autocorrect!!!  
**swoleyoon:** i meant his wenis! the skin on his elbow!  
**bracesboy:** how ur phone recognizes penis more than wenis is concerning  
**bracesboy:** wtf do u and kwan text each other abt  
**jacekim:** we text like regular ppl with intellectual topics wdym  
**lordalmightypowerful:** who tf u foolin kwan yall aint that innocent  
**jchan:** so thats what its called :o  
**lordalmightypowerful:** and btw yoon that isnt a fucking compliment  
**bracesboy:** he just said ur elbow skin was nice  
**bracesboy:** that was, after he corrected his compliment abt ur dick  
**lordalmightypowerful:** i could have accepted the first one  
**lordalmightypowerful:** who tf ever finds elbow skin attractive  
**jacekim:** if ur elbow skin is nice, then ur face might be just as nice too considering u take care of the small things  
**jacekim:** god u never think things through  
**lordalmightypowerful:** did u just underestimate my intelligence kim byeongkwan?!?!?  
**bracesboy:** what intelligence  
**bracesboy:** junhee and intelligence  
**bracesboy:** those two words dont correlate  
**jchan:** but if ur complimenting a small thing doesnt that mean the big things arent good at all  
**lordalmightypowerful:** i can always trust yoochan to explain things in such thorough well constructed analysis  
**bracesboy:** hes not ur fucking interpreter leave him tf alone  
**lordalmightypowerful:** possessive ass little bitch this is why u get one tenths from the food portion  
**swoleyoon:** as if the portions were sufficient enough for five people in the first place  
**jacekim:** we legit eat scraps  
**lordalmightypowerful:** it just takes one fucking compliment to change that is it rlly so hard to do  
**bracesboy:** oh u have no idea  
**jchan:** tell him smth nice abt his personality  
**jacekim:** he had such a thing?  
**swoleyoon:** junhee ur superiority complex is very astounding  
**lordalmightypowerful:** ok thats it u guys arent eating tonight  
**jacekim:** istg the extreme lengths we go through to receive the most basic needs of man  
**bracesboy:** lmao remember when he made us like and share his selfie in exchange for a tube of toothpaste  
**swoleyoon:** oh god that time when he wouldnt let us go out for not allowing him to join blind dates  
**swoleyoon:** u scare the girls away how can we take u with us  
**lordalmightypowerful:** u jerks are just scared id steal them all with my charms  
**jchan:** lol @ that one time he tried kissing the girl piss drunk and threw up in her mouth  
**jacekim:** slick move. way to go prince charming! ur the master in the art of flirtation  
**lordalmightypowerful:** now THATS a compliment!  
**jacekim:** is ur sarcasm radar defected  
**lordalmightypowerful:** are u taking it back :)  
**jacekim:** fine whatever keep it idc just feed me  
**jacekim:** were eating lamb skewers right  
**bracesboy:** kwan has succumbed to the dark overlord  
**bracesboy:** man down! man down!  
**jchan:** he discarded his pride and dignity as the no.1 junhee anti  
**swoleyoon:** babe why didnt u put up a fight ):  
**swoleyoon:** im so disappointed ):  
**jacekim:** listen, i can be an asshole another day but that day is not today  
**jacekim:** yall can die if u want im out to eat good  
**lordalmightypowerful:** who said im taking u with us :)  
**bracesboy:** OOH SHIT PLOT TWIST  
**swoleyoon:** i think kwan forgot junhee is borderline petty  
**jacekim:** WTF THATS SO UNFAIR I DID WHAT U WANTED ME TO FUCKING DO  
**lordalmightypowerful:** maybe u should have thought twice abt going near my journal :)  
**jchan:** poor kwan hyung ):  
**jacekim:** WOW WTF  
**swoleyoon:** what, what did i do now  
**jacekim:** NOT U DUMB FUCK  
**swoleyoon:** oh.... i see......  
**jacekim:** FUCK IM SO SORRY BBY I GOT CARRIED AWAY  
**jacekim:** i have no excuse. i deserve to be punished )):  
**swoleyoon:** we'll see :))  
**bracesboy:** can u guys take that convo somewhere else we dont need to know abt ur kinky agendas  
**lordalmightypowerful:** when will i have kinky agendas  
**jacekim:** when u stop being a manipulative asshole for starters  
**jchan:** kwan hyung is back in business  
**swoleyoon:** thats my boy  <3  
**lordalmightypowerful:** u guys are some sadistic motherfuckers  
**lordalmightypowerful:** yall need help  
**jacekim:** thats rich coming from u  
**bracesboy:** he needs all the help he can get  
**lordalmightypowerful:** hey chan do u like steak :)  
**jchan:** hell yea i do!  
**swoleyoon:** ur fucking evil  
**jacekim:** yea sure we're the sadistic ones alrite  
**bracesboy:** who needs steak anyways  
**bracesboy:** we can always go vegan  
**jacekim:** i think the fuck not  
**jacekim:** im a full blooded carnivore. i thrive in fresh blood and meat slaughter  
**bracesboy:** umm yoon i think ur boyfriend is on the verge of being psychotic  
**swoleyoon:** i dont mind. hes sexier that way  <3  
**jchan:** this group really has some serious issues im the last man standing  
**bracesboy:** dont forget abt me bby boy. i still have some sanity left in me  
**swoleyoon:** says chan sasaeng numero uno with the huge chan shrine in the closet  
**bracesboy:** u guys dont appreciate him enough so i figured id do all the compensating  
**swoleyoon:** come back when u come up w a better excuse  
**jacekim:** alrite gang listen up  
**jacekim:** im gonna need u guys to help me tie jun up so we can snatch his wallet and make a run for it  
**lordalmightypowerful:** WTF  
**lordalmightypowerful:** u guys will suck at heists  
**lordalmightypowerful:** usually the first thing u dont ever want to do is tell the enemy ur entire plan  
**bracesboy:** we're giving u an idea of whats coming for u :)  
**lordalmightypowerful:** fuck yall!  
**lordalmightypowerful:** stay the fuck away from me!

**lordalmightypowerful has signed off**

**jchan:** umm guys he just exited the building  
**bracesboy:** dw wowson are stationed on both the back exit and the entrance  
**jchan:** this is so intense  
**jchan:** i feel like we're in a james bond movie  
**jacekim:** WE SUCCESSFULLY SUBDUED THE TARGET  
**jacekim:** WE OBTAINED THE WALLET  
**jacekim:** GANG ROLL OUT WE'RE GETTING STEAK  
**jchan:** aye aye captain!  
**bracesboy:** roger!  
**jchan:** oh before that  
**jchan:** dont tell jun hyung im the one who changed his id  
**jchan:** >:D


End file.
